Leon's Random Ramblings

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Divorce is a mistake

Divorce MistakesAh, the big “D”. While I do not agree with the notion that any marriage can at anytime be broken up on a whim, I’m sure there must be times when divorce (and all the damage that is causes) is justified. So you do the big “D”.

But being a man (and as I said before, I am a man) we seem to make mistakes. Lots of man-mistakes. We get angry, we take revenge. We demolish. Tsk-tsk … not good, any of it. We seem to be pre-programmed to act in a particular predictable way. And lawyers are only too willing to take the poor womans side and exploit our manly weaknesses.

There must be a better way and I’ve been searching for it. Too sad it came to me too late, but I recently discovered Jeffery M. Leving’s most recent book Divorce Wars (HarperCollins), is a field guide to the winning tactics, preemptive strikes, and top maneuvers when divorce gets ugly. His Law Offices at Jeffery M. Leving, Ltd. is possibly one of the only law firms in the USA focused almost exclusively on men’s issues.

His other groundbreaking books Fathers’ Rights (Basic Books), published in 1997, presents hard-hitting and fair advice for every father involved in a custody dispute. It is the definitive work on the subject.

I wish I had advice like this in my days [click here], it would have helped a lot. He advises not to react with anger (at least visibly – who would not be angry to see your beloved spouse in the arms of another man), to act in an honourable manner, and not to seek revenge. Those are tough goals, very tough. But in hindsight they are spot-on. Ten years after you can raise your head and say – with a clear conscience – I was not the one who did it.

And please, leave the children out of it? They are not involved in the divorce. Yes, I’m talking to females, mothers, women. I’ve seen cases where a woman may have a vagina but she doesn’t have one gram of female hormones – she uses her children to get at the father. Just remember, ladies, 10, 20 years from now when that child has grown up, it might not agree with the way you did it. They may actually hate you for what you did.

So, if divorce is necessary, don’t make mistakes.

One Response to “Divorce is a mistake”

  1. Torie Says:

    Fell out of bed feeling down. This has brgihetned my day!

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